realities

I've been struggling with the decision to take my older son out of private school and move to public school. We are in NYC, which doesn't have the best reputation, but we do live in an affluent neighborhood, so the schools are NOT terrible. I'm not thrilled with our preschool. And I hate that it is so white and the play dates we have been on have been to families with significantly more money than us.

So today, Matt Damon enrolled his toddler in the school. What a wake up call. If he is enrolling his kid, clearly this is more of an elitist school than I had thought. Clearly, given our finances and my goals of a good but diversified education, public is the way to go!

day 2

Tonight after dinner I asked the hubby to sit down and meal plan for the week; you'd thought I was trying an at home tooth extraction. Really! Just for meal planning. I'm heading out of town on Thursday for the business, and its a good thing. He thinks he can go all week without spending a dime. I applaud the effort, but one does need to eat. However he is a food SNOB, so getting him off his high horse on only ordering at the costly end or expecting four star meals when I cook, will be fun. I think a great sensitivity process is he'll be cooking for himself Thursday through next Wednesday and see the cost of his creative dinner ingredients.

Me, I'm just looking forward to a good night's sleep and no family drama by working the trade show for 12 hours a day. yeah, there is drama associated with that, but it is different when I can go back to the hotel and just unwind.

Then today a cost was thrown at me, my computer died. I'll find out the damages, cost wise, of a new hard drive tomorrow. But at least that comes out of the business.

Day 1

Sometime I'll have time to give a great back ground, but in a nut shell:

• I'm the bread winner of my family
  
• I lost my corporate job a 13 months ago
  
• I've started two new businesses in the last year, both have done well, but only one is making money
  
• My spouse has always 'worked' but not contributed to the household income.
  
• I need to control our coast and raise my income
  
• I'm doing it alone.  My spouse is supportive, but not a leader.
  
• I have two children ages 5 an under.
  
• We are accustomed to a very healthy income.
  

So parts of step 1 are: 

• we are going to monitor every penny we spend for the next month.  then analyze potential changes
  
• If we eat out, then I will eat salad.  
  
• My eldest is currently applying for public school for next fall, out of public (a savings of 30K a year).
  
• I'm redoing our tax strategy - read taking it away from my spouse and have an accountant involved which cost me about 3K in the short run, but should result in some returns and less fear IRS repercussions to anything my hubby is doing behind my back.
  
• Once taxes are all filed appropriately, I'm going to try to change the payment schedule on one of our mortgages.
  
• I'm using quick books for the first time for both my businesses, my hubbies and our personal expenses.
  
• I'm creating new plans for my businesses
• I expect nothing from my husbands, but I also shut down his office, which yes, means we are both now working from home.

Hey, its a start.

hubby signs

Today at lunch at the dinner, my husband suggested getting food wrapped to go.  I was impressed to see him moving the right direction.  Of course, we were eating at a restaurant with the kids which is not the best step forward in our efforts.

Yesterday we spent part of the day cleaning his office, prepping for its shut down.

Holiday traditions

What's up with holiday cards.  I try to write a funny little family letter to let our closest friends know what's been up in the last year.  So far this year, and yes it is Christmas eve, we have received two cards from families that we don't even know that share the same preschool class as our boys (like why bother?) and a slew of cards from friends with their names printed on them but they didn't even bother to sign them or even try to put in a note.  Yeah, its nice to see a picture of your kids.  But if that is all you are sending, without even signing, then either we are not close enough for you to waste the stamp, or we are so close you didn't need bother.  Maybe I'm the only one that likes a letter, but I want to reach out and let you know what is up, and frankly I'd love to hear what is up on your end.  Frugal, yeah, stop the endless cards if there is no content and no connection.  Just email me.  Then at least I'll have a good address at which to reach you.

Garbage

Garbage to me seems overwhelming.  How can I be controlling cost, limiting our expenditures, yet still taking out bag after bag of garbage.  Yes, there is diapers and food stuff from cooking. but the rest of it amazes me.  I think this will be one thing I wish to reduce in the year to come.  A smaller foot print in just garbage.

Hello

On Frugal

- a google search on the word "Frugal" will yield 9,520,000 results!

 - a result for definition from the Merriam-Webster dictionary provides, "characterized by or reflecting economy in the use of resources".

 - but when using the same Merriam-Webster but by thesaurus the following is provided;

Meaning: careful in the management of money or resources frugal, the family is able to stretch its monthly budget>

Synonyms economical, economizing, provident, scrimping, sparing, thrifty

Related Words conserving, preserving, saving; fore handed, foresighted, prudent; penny-wise; cheap, close, closefisted, miserly, niggardly, parsimonious, stingy, stinting, tight, tightfisted

Antonyms prodigal, wasteful

This blog is about my struggle with become frugal not just with money but, more importantly my most precious resources, time, energy and love.  It is no coincidence that I start writing today, as I have real goals for changes to make in 2010.  2008 was hell.   2009 was transition and interesting.  But wow I'm emerging hopeful and beaten down.  So 2010 is about really making it happen.  It is now clear to me I can't do it all.  I may want to have it all, but it takes work.  And some things have to change.  

I have ideas about what to change.  But I am scared shit less about making the changes.  I am the bread winner for my family.  And they seem nervous as they note I am about to start demanding some big changes.  Is it about being economically frugal?  Partially.  But it is about being self-frugal; I just can't do it all and things have to change.